It’s been a weird year. To be honest, every time I try to think of something exciting that happened this year, I almost invariably think of something that happened in 2013.
That’s not all true. I’ve had some amazing, exciting experiences. Inhuman Condition got funded by the Independent Production Fund! I had my first professional pitch! I was a Teaching Assistant at York University, and through that got my first taste of teaching! In the Spring, I helped run a panel on webseries with other York grad students! Plus, this year I finished a script I’m really proud of (More), as well as taking on more screenwriting work and cementing myself as a working screenwriter. I also dug back into fanfiction, a hobby I left behind when I was a teenager, which is nice because I’ve felt disingenuous defending it for years without writing it myself. So this year has definitely had bright spots.
But really, it’s been a year of waiting. Waiting for my thesis idea to finally click (it took until September, after a wasted summer lingering on something that wasn’t working). Waiting to see if Inhuman Condition would get funded (it did!), then waiting to get back to working on it (now). Waiting to hear back from fellowships that I knew I wouldn’t get (I knew I had weak, rushed samples), from contests I wasn’t going to place in. Even when I’m working, I’m waiting on something else. I think I’m restless. It doesn’t help that the world seems to be going to hell in a handbasket.
Next year is going to be amazing. Part of why this year was so underwhelming is that I’ve spent all year prepping things that are going to really kick off next year. Inhuman Condition, of course, but also a handful of other projects with heartening developments. If half of what I’m working on goes, 2015 will blow my mind.
Of course, it’s so typical of me to judge a year by professional milestones instead of happiness, because – in terms of sources of joy, this year, I’ve had a few. I’ve met some awesome friends, gone out for social beers more often than I have in years, spent a lot of time with family – and saw my awesome oldest sister, who lives in Newfoundland, for the first time in two years! I joined Tumblr (and in doing so rejoined fandom), and even though it’s terrifying, it’s also one of the warmest communities I’ve ever spent time in, give or take political infighting and unnecessary drama. And the books! After years of barely touching the things, this year I read a whacking 56 books, and enjoyed most of them. At the macro 2014 has been a bit of a lame duck for me, but at the day-to-day level, I’ve had some pretty great days.
So all in all, 2014… I didn’t love you, but there were bright spots and happy threads. I’m proud of some of the things I accomplished, I had a lot of fun even though there were extended stretches of dull grey.
I think I’m ready for 2015. Onwards!